What does a woman want in relationship with their bf?
I recently learned:
For a
Woman, the essential needs are:
1) AffectionFor the guy to show affections, care and concern, feel the love and bond.
2) ConversationA very important point. When a guy is going after a girl, he tends to listen to whatever she says, her life, her day, her everything, The purpose of doing so is actually, to get to know the girl better, to find out what she likes, what she needs, what she dislikes and all. Through talks like this, a guy could realise what are the stuff the girl likes even without asking a girl directly, " what kind of movies do you like to watch?" or rather, he could just find out with a girl's conversation, " On, i watched xxxxx with my friend, and its a really nice movie, very romantic". And thats when the guy would pay attentive attention to the girl, in order to go after her.
And im many cases, when both parties start off and went into a relationship together, slowly and gradually, they tend to communicate lesser, having lesser (in-depth) conversations. But have you thought of why communication is so important in a relationship? Because with conversations, you are actually conversing your needs and wants to your other half. Such that, your girlfriend says, " My friend and her bf went on to this place and said that the food and ambience is really great!" - it shows she hopes to have a chance to visit there to taste the food and enjoy the ambience, or " today my boss scolded me in front of my colleagues.." she hopes that you will be there with her, cheering her up, be by her.
Without conversations together, how are you supposed to know and find out what he/she needs? Needs and wants are changing everyday, and when a guy is chasing a girl, he perfectly understands what she needs and wants, hence, things are so smooth and sweet. Thus, when they are together, they made lesser effort to have conversations and thats when couples drift apart, couples quarrel. And also, don't you think, by conversation, you are actually showing affections at the same time? showing concern at the same time?
It is also true that, a girl might have her girlfriends to share her problems, her life, (since u guys might say, girls talk etc) and have a guy thought of that- when a girl be with you, she is also actually choosing you to be the BEST Friend of her best friends? Cause she wants to share every part of her life with you, wanting each other to understand and share everything together, fulfilling each other's needs on the way. And as time goes by, any expression of yours, the girlfriend would be able to understand straight away, knowing what to do & how to cheer you, how you feel, understand you completely, be with you, supporting you with whatever you do. And you'll be surprised how much she can understand you, even more than your parents, your bestest friend(s).
And i guess in many cases, the guy tends to
not show interest in whatever the girlfriend might be saying, such as " i went shopping with my gf today and i bought xxxx and xxxx etc" which the guy might think its nothing important, boring to hear and all, but actually, the girlfriend is conversing with you, and you never know, you might actually get to know certain needs and wants of your girlfriend through those conversations. And research actually showed that, a guy should actually have 15 hours of conversation with the girlfriend per week. (dont be shock, you will understand later again).
Also, when the guy stop showing interest or just giving a slight acknowledgment when the girlfriend is trying to converse, it is obvious showing that the guy is not interested to listen, and the girl slowly shares all these with other people instead. And thats when the worst come, couple drifts apart, and the girl found a guy friend to share her stuff, and slowly, she shares with him cuz he would listen attentively. And when a huge quarrel happened between the couple, the girl might even call up the other guy to sob to him, complain to him, and perhaps, the girl might feel greater concern and interest from the other guy, hence, it would harm the current relationship between the couple.
3) Honesty and OpennessFemales want the guy to be honest and open with her. As much as how these two words sound so simple, TRUST AND SECURITY. it is something so important in the relationship, that, even if you ever spoil it a little, it causes HARM to your relationship.
Share with your girlfriend everything she wants to know. Be open with her. There is one sentence I feel that it is so true so true- " Just Tell your girlfriend the truth,
A female is much stronger that you think she is when hearing the truth" Sometimes guys might just think, telling a white lie, telling partial truth or not telling the girlfriend might make it bettter, might prevent unnecessary quarrels and might prevent causing the girlfriend to feel unhappy. But yes, i do agree very much, girls are much stronger to take in the truth and hear the truth than the guys think they are.
Telling partial truth, telling white lies, telling information that is not false but NOT accurate, is also considered not telling the truth. Girls want accurate truth, the word is
accurate.